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14 December, 2013

Forgiveness? . . . and the Cunning Fennec Fox




14 December 2013

1242 hrs




Well, Dear and Patient Readers,

            Another installment of the Cunning Fennec Fox’s world, ever turning, ever spinning, ever hurtling through space at 32,000 miles per second.



            Forgiveness, and what about it?  Christians and Buddhists; Muslims and Hindus- they all, as well as many others, even the secular, expound at length on the idea of it.  Of forgiveness.  Forgiveness. 

            That no one is as bad as The Worst He or She Has Ever Done . . .  How could any of us be?  There is always something good there in the heart of another, is there not?  Are none of us looking far enough or deeply enough?

            So many on this world speak good speeches on the necessity of forgiveness, yet when they try to put it to practice, they all seem to fall short, somehow.



            I can only speak of those in my circle, but my circle is large in its diameter, long in its circumference, and broad in its girth.  I know many people, and many know me.

            With my old career in medicine and my fairly extensive travels, those whom I have met must number into the hundreds of thousands.  Yet so few of them can look beyond the pasts of many more.  Why is this?  I myself will give anyone two chances to treat me courteously and respectfully; to judge (if I should even use that word) someone by the way they treat me from that moment onward only.  Why two chances?  Well, everyone has bad days.  Maybe that first opportunity to make an impression was simply that person’s every-once-in-a-while-bad-day.

            I feel another can be judged (that word again) by how kind he or she is to me when they do not have to be.  Isn’t that a good way to weigh my fellow man?  Does it matter to me what they did in their (troubled?  Checkered, even) past?  Should it?  If so, why?  It doesn’t matter to me right now.  Perhaps I am unwise in giving these folks, everyone I meet, a chance to redeem themselves in a new relationship, however brief or extended that relationship might be.

            We are all broken; some of us more than others.  As a whole, I tend to dislike Humanity; I feel people are the worst thing to ever happen to the planet, with our pollution and our destruction of everything in our way.  Our wanton disregard for our fellow humans.  How we all want more for me and less for you.  In fact, you should give me yours.  I am better or stronger or worth more than you are. 

            Look at how we hunt, for example.  Americans go hunting on a full stomach.  Does that really make a whole lot of sense?

            Oh, and I love this argument:  Well, hunting is just part of nature.  Hunters cull the herd.  Really.  Hmmm, let us dissect that a bit:

            Nature culls the herd with the predator(s) separating the old, the weak, and the infirm from the herd.  They isolate the “parasitic” creature and remove it and therefore its infirmity or whatever from the genetics of the group.  The lame slow down the herd; the weaker newborns use too many resources from their mothers, who may even get killed themselves trying to protect the young that won’t thrive, anyway.  Then she and her excellent motherly instincts are removed from the herd, and the gene pool is diluted by that fraction more.

            How many hunters out there say, “Screw it.  I ain’t gonna kill that prize buck . . .  I’m gonna wait until I see an old one limp along, and then I’ll shoot it through its bony ribcage . . .?”

            I have never heard it.  We (humans . . . hunters) look for the most excellent trophy specimen we can find and remove its DNA from the population.  The bigger the faster the better.  Nature does not do that.  OK, it’s not for me to say who can go out there and kill critters.  I myself do not.  I am an excellent marksman; even better with a telescopic sight, and I used to hunt successfully every season, no matter the game.  So go out there and kill shit left and right.  Just don’t pretend you mimic the natural order of things and say you “cull the herd.”  You’re weak AND a liar if you do.

            SO how did I digress so far from my original point?  Jesus, I am as my writing professor admonished:  Disorganized. 

            I was only illustrating how we humans, in trying to defend our behavior, make excuses for it based on faulty data and weak anecdotes.  We are the worst thing that has ever happened to the planet.



            But let’s filter down to individuals.  There are, you bet, people that get their two chances with me and then never get any deeper into my circle.  Sometimes I avoid them completely, excluding them from my life altogether.  That is not to say that they have no redeeming qualities whatsoever; quite the opposite I am sure.  I just don’t have time to wait for them to make me feel good, or feel like I am a better person for knowing them.

            I surround myself with people that make me feel good.  Why hang out with people that make me feel bad, waiting until they don’t?  Bullshit.  Life is too short.

            I know a guy, a good friend of mine, who did nearly 30 years in state prison for murder.  He and his younger brother shot a man while robbing a gas station.  The armed robbery aggravated the sentence, and these two boys, 19 and 17 years old at the time were given the maximum sentence at the time.

            But they are not murderers, nor are they aggravated robbers.  They are human beings, kind ones even, who both have committed a crime.  A serious crime, to be sure; perhaps the saddest crime there is.  There is no coming back for the victim of murder.  Almost everyone I know would never have the first thing to do with this friend of mine. 

And the Christians who always use the whole, “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her . . .” (Of course, they always misquote it, being so well-versed in their own fucking Bible) argument?  Sounds good until you apply it to real life. 

Other religions out there are not exempt, either.  I can’t count how many “Buddhists” (or “students” of Buddha’s teachings) I have met who say people should have compassion for others in order to decrease all suffering, and then turn around and say they can have no more contact with somebody because something emerged about their past.  Sometimes these Holies even aid in the propagation of rumors or exacerbate the shunning process.  Fucking hypocrisy.


I’m no Dalai Lama, but I am pretty sure that the Main Tenet of Buddhism is not, “Every Man for Himself . . . oh and uh, stay away from that guy . . .”

            I would never begrudge a person of his past if he or she treats me well in the present.  Why is it I?  Why is it that the best Christian or whatever forgiving-type at the table is the Atheist? 

If you do not measure the value of a person by whom he or she is now, but only look at, not the way they were even, but only by  the things they have done in their past . . .  well then, I am better than you. 

Does that make me conceited?  Maybe.  But that conceit means that there are many people out there who can come to me and feel comfortable, knowing they will not be punished on this earth forever.  That they have a safe haven here within my own heart.  So all of you hypocrites that spout love and brotherhood and turning the other cheek can go fuck yourselves.  Most of you are not the ones whose cheeks were slapped in the first place!




Are these people, in your eyes, really beyond all redemption?  Can’t people be sorry for the things they have done?  Maybe they can’t fix whatever it is they broke in another human being.  Maybe a family is forever changed by that person’s bad act.  But what if they never break the law again?  Not only that, but what if they do good things from here on out?  What if they try to make amends as well as they know how, or at the best of their ability with whatever tools they have at their disposal?  What if they help others get over the hurdles that rise up in all of our lives?  What if they help another student or coworker deal with a problem and better that person’s life, or ease their suffering, or make a dream come true? 

Or will you assholes out there forever say, “Hey, there’s that rapist who pulled all of those kids from that burning bus . . . stay away from him.”  Does that mean this person should never find happiness, or have a family of his or her own, or that they should be alone until they die, and even then not have a hand held by a nurse as he or she breathes his or her last?

What about those of you who have broken a promise?  Any of you saints around?  You have a much greater chance of re-offending than my friends mentioned back there, the two repentant brothers.  You never went to jail for that broken promise, however deeply it hurt the other; you cheaters and many who are unfaithful to your spouses.  Those who forget about their ends of bargains . . .  Should you all be forever shunned?  Hypocrites.




Forgiveness my ass.  I see more haters in this world than I ever see lovers.  Heaven must truly be as scantly populated as the Sahara itself if y’all are the yardstick by which St. Peter measures the good in man.  I don’t even believe in a Heaven, but I’m sure glad it’s not full of freaks like you of whom I speak.  (Dear and Patient Reader you, of course, are excluded from this herd against whom I rant).

You deserve no reward Up There if this is how you are Down Here.  I don’t see many of y’all trying to be better people than you are right now . . .  But you know what?  I forgive you.




The Cunning Fennec Fox

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